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Thursday, February 19th, 2009
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So I just painted my nails and I'm waiting for them to get really dry instead of tacky-dry. Don't ask how I'm typing, just know here are a lot of typos deleting.
I love and hate having my nails painted. I love having my toes in dark colors but I hate having polish on my fingers. I abuse my fingernails and polish never lasts more than a week. It's a wonder how they grow out so pretty. My toes haven't been naked in about two months.
Bleh.
( I haven't done one of these in forever )
( because I won't let Facebook turn into Myspace )
Before I go, I just want to say that this picture is terrifying. But Matt's response is the best.
//end 04:02am
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Tuesday, January 13th, 2009
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asdfghkl
Apparently I forgot to use one of my scholarships from high school. I reallllly wish I had realized it while still in college. It could have paid for my entire Junior year. Hell, it would have helped Senior year when they stopped giving me financial aid. Ugh, but it's too late. I feel so dumb. I don't want to go back to school now just to use a scholarship.
I guess it's cool that I have until my 30th birthday to use it but I'd rather use it now to pay off my loans.
I hope this isn't my Happy Pi Day scholarship.
BTW, I only had 2hrs of sleep.
I almost made it through the weekend without crying. Sooo close...
//end 09:38am
//begin
Sleep attempt #2
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Monday, January 5th, 2009
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I've been keeping track of my spending lately on Excel. Apparently during December I magically didn't use my credit card at all. I was so proud of myself.
I say was because on Sunday I finally caved into my hotdog craving (weird right?). I thought I had $3 for a corndog BUT I didn't. I feel embarrassed that my first credit card purchase of 2009 is a corndog.
Today was the librarian page exam. I didn't really feel nervous since I knew it was a written exam and not the oral exam/interview. Ernie and I got there exactly at 1pm and stood in the huge line to get in. We officially started at 1:30pm and I finished at 2pm. Yosh! I was one of the first 5 to finish/leave. Ernie took another 20mins and then we went to celebrate with pho and I went to Rite-Aid to pick up some stuff.
Now I have 4-6wks to wait for my scantron results :/
I left my frikkin toothbrush at Matt's.
Well, since this is my first post of the new year, I guess I have to say what I did for New Years. Matt and I didn't really have any plans set so I got dressed for something and watched the NHK Countdown. I'm so mad that I missed Ayumi's performance at the opening. Err... Then I went to my grama's for dinner while still dressed up. My mom convinced Charles that he needed to see fireworks so my mom and uncle decided that we'd go see them. I hate fireworks and I hate crowds, so you can imagine how happy I was being dragged to SF to watch fireworks with my annoying cousins instead of drinking with Matt. My mom made me bring my huge jacket that I got for Christmas even though I was already wearing a bunch of clothes. Well, since I was so angry, and thus warm, I didn't need the jacket. Once the fireworks actually started we realized that we couldn't really see them so we ran to the other side of Pier 1 and tried to squeeze in to see them. Still no luck. Once they were done we went home where Menu and I had spaghetti and Guinness in our rooms.
//end 12:36am
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Sunday, December 28th, 2008
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Well, Christmas was reasonably bearable since Brian brough Wall-E to watch. The food was terrible and somehow my mom managed to turn a ham into what I can only describe as meat-dough *bleck* My aunt gave me a new shirt which doesn't really fit me but I still like it. I guess my only real highlight of the day (besides Wall-E) was downloading Wang Leehom's new album 心．跳 (w00t!).
On Friday I went to SF with Matt and Brad instead of shopping with my mom & cousin at Stoneridge. I thought they were going to get on at Dublin/Pleasanton BART and meet me on the train but instead they got on at Walnut Creek & left me to ride alone. Then, once I got to SF, I took the wrong exit and they had to come find me since I still don't know my way around. We walked around and eventually walked all the way to Japantown for dinner and more shopping/walking. I'm very proud to say that even with all the store sales I didn't buy anything except a bowl of udon for dinner. Yosh!
I wasn't expecting to stay over Matt's house over the weekend but I guess I had to since he had a mountain of gifts to give me and we left Brad's house late and I didn't bring my keys, or much of anything for that matter.
I thought this Christmas I wouldn't get a lot of presents but thanks to Matt and these post-Christmas sales (aka Black Friday redux) I somehow wound up with a lot. Most of it's clothes, which is cool, but it means that I have to reorganize and throw out some old stuff to fit my tiny closet. My room right now is a complete disaster because of Christmas. At first it was from making presents and now on top of that mess is all my new stuff.
( What did I get? )
I have the worst bedhead ever. I blame Matt's pillows & going to bed with wet hair. I never do it unless I have to 'cuz usually I wake up stuffy and sick. Now my hair's being annoying and won't do what I want.
Mmmm...Guinness in the privacy of my own room...I miss this...
//end 12:14am
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Thursday, December 25th, 2008
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Merry Christmas if you're into that sorta thing. I'm already having a crummy day on top of what's to come later.
( bah humbug )
I'm almost over my cold. There's still a little sniffle and cough.
I feel pretty bipolar listening to 心跳 and then 酸甜. It's like going from 0 to 100 in 5mins. But I'm loving them so much right now.
Kes- your package should be at your MV house by now. Had I known my brother was going to be lame and send them out late I would've sent them to Humboldt. I hope you're having fun with your duckies :D
//end 12:26am
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Thursday, December 18th, 2008
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| Subject: | 带走我的心跳 |
| Time: | 11:29 pm. |
| Mood: |  sick. | | Music: | SEASONS :: Ayumi Hamasaki. |
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Ugh, I'm incredibly sick right now at the worst possible time. I'm suppose to go with Matt & his family to see the Nutcracker in SF on Saturday and I don't even want to think about going outside. I feel soo bad because I reallllyy want to go and they have a spare ticket and I feel bad bailing out at the last minute. Ugh, stupid body.
I finally finished my holiday packages. I only made 4 but man were they a bitch to make. I am not looking forward to the second batch.
I spent 3hrs baking cookies yesterday. 3-frikkin-hours for a batch of cookies. My cookies kept coming out like fake vomit so I had to keep adding flour and baking test cookies until they were ok. Ugh, and I still have to make some for Noca since he replied late.
I reallllly hope my packages get mailed out safely.
Bedtime for me.
//end 11:42pm
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Saturday, December 6th, 2008
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So Planned Parenthood wasn't as scary as I thought. I got some tests done for STIs and I got some NuvaRings and two packs of Plan B for "just in case." This whole Plan B stuff is still weird to me, but at least I know if something goes wrong and I have another pregnancy freak out I have something to deal with it. My side effects haven't been terrible. When I first put it in I felt kinda nauseous for a few days. If I wasn't nauseous then I was having a little headaches. Five days later I'm ok. I have my hunger and my sweet tooth back from being on my period and then starting the ring. Too bad there's still nothing to eat.
Apparently I weigh 122lbs, which is slightly more than I thought. Usually I'm <120lbs. Two pounds isn't that big of a deal to me, but considering I was weighed during my period when I barely eat anything surprises me. Water weight? Maybe. I"m still sorta underweight according to BMI charts. I say sorta because I don't actually know how tall I am.
It's kinda creepy how I can hear the PA system over at Canyon Middle School. I live on the hill across from it and I can hear everything the PA says.
I don't know what to do for Christmas. I don't know what I want and I don't know what to get everyone else.
//end 01:30am
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Monday, December 1st, 2008
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Well, hopefully tomorrow/today I'm finally getting some birth control. I'm still scared but right now this period is reminding me why I should get it.
( Oh yes, TMI )
Ok, enough about periods.
Matt may or may not have work tomorrow. If he does then we have to reschedule our appointment. According to him, all we're going to do tomorrow is talk about contraceptives and hopefully we'll leave with a sample to see how I react. I don't think I'm doing any tests yet, and if there are they won't be poking around my bloody bits.
I got a free nail polish in the mail. It's pomegranate color (seen here) and I would like it a lot more if it didn't look like period blood on my fingers.
Srsly, that's enough about bleeding...
*snuggles heating pad*
//end 01:36am
*wish me luck tomorrow/today*
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Saturday, November 29th, 2008
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I'm finally getting my ass to Planned Parenthood and getting on birth control. Matt and I have our consultation on Monday and I'm scared and excited. I haven't told my mom yet and I feel like I shouldn't just because I don't want her freaking out because it means that I'm having sex. If I do ever tell her, I'll be sure to emphasize all the period-related stuff to her since she knows I have the worst periods ever.
Speaking of periods, I'm afraid mine's going to start soon and screw up all this birth control business. I hope my body's just faking me out right now. I don't want to bleed on a stranger.
On Saturday I got to work on a short film out in Pinole. Matt meet a guy at Sansei Live a few months ago and has been helping him make this film out in Concord. Saturday was the last day of shooting and it was the most important scene. I got to be an extra and Matt was busy shooting behinds the scenes stuff and working the boom mic. It was fun. I mimed a crazy cat story and I probably stick out on film because of it.
On Thanksgiving we played mahjong for the first time in a long time. My mom totally owned us. She won every round and even managed to get a full house. I don't really know how to play but I did good enough against my mom, uncle, and aunt.
I'm trying to add lyrics to all my music files. I seriously do not recommend taking this on if you have a ton of music and no patience. I got his widget awhile ago that automatically finds and displays lyrics to whatever song is playing on iTunes. However, it's pretty limited to English and Jpop songs IF it can recognize the artist, album, or title (which it usually doesn't). Thus my massive iTunes reorganization project began. Right now I'm using animelyrics.com to help me work through all my anime soundtracks and Jpop. Once I'm done with that site I'm using Divine Ayu to work though my bazillion Ayumi Hamasaki files (their format is easier to copy+paste). I haven't done anything with my Chinese songs yet and I'm not excited to get to them.
I just wolfed down two giant muffins...ugh...
//end 02:36am
EDIT 06:37am
asdfghjkl;
My period just started :'(
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Monday, November 17th, 2008
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Here's a picture of my weekend from Jesus' myspace. Hopefully it's rotated like it's suppose to be.
I wish someone took a picture of my bowling score. On the first round my scoreboard said "6, 6, 6, 6, 7, strike." I'm also hella sore from bowling. My right shoulder hurts and I broke my thumbnail because it was too long.
I found out my iTunes has been making duplicate files of all my songs. I spent 2 days deleting about 10GB worth of files out of my iTunes library. Now I have to fix all of my song infos since all the edits I made were on the files I had to delete. I'm also trying to work in album art and hopefully some lyrics.
If I ever get a dog I want either a Shiba Inu or a Welsh Corgi. Something happy, fluffy, and clean. Then again, I'm not a dog person...
Once again I'm trying to knit a scarf. Last time I used my favorite Broccoli pens to make one and one of them leaked. This time I'm using the chopsticks Mike gave me for Christmas. I should actually buy some real knitting needles, or at least some metal chopsticks. My stitches never seem to want to slide off.
I need to get my ass to Planned Parenthood.
//end 3:06am
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Wednesday, November 5th, 2008
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I don't know what to say about this election. I'm sooo happy that McCain's not the new president but I'm sooo disappointed by Prop 8 passing. WTH California? Discrimination is discrimination. Don't make it the law.
Before going to vote, my mom took a moment to tell me to vote for Prop 8. I don't think she fully understood what it was about since she kept saying that it was okay for them to marry but they couldn't have children because it was unnatural. She even tried an analogy, saying "Chickens can have babies with chickens, that's natural." Ha. Anyways, since I was the only person in my family to vote (shameshame) I voted against it.
During this election I learned that Noca, Brandon, and Brad were voting for McCain and 8. Srsly? I expected this from Brad, but Noca and Brandon? Ugh, male insecurities. If Noca & Brandon show up this Saturday I don't think I can talk to them.
Yummers!
Can I just say that I love this ad?
Don't you just want Samuel L. Jackson to say "Vote no on Prop 8. It's wrong and unfair M*****F*****!" Menu and I were watching it at my grama's and when they showed the Japanese internment camps I told Menu, "That's going to happen if McCain win." We had a good laugh about it.
My period's ending. Matt and I will probably go to Planned Parenthood next week once everything's drained out. Eww...
I hate the weather. My skins already getting super dry. Even my lips hurt from being so dry.
//end 12:21am
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Monday, November 3rd, 2008
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So yea...that whole freak out I was having over my period was for nothing. My period started after Halloween. I don't think I've ever been this relieved to have a period. Even though it's a giant pain to have every month, it's a whole lot better than pushing a watermelon out of my crotch with a room full of people watching.
This week has really convinced me that I need to finally get some birth control. I've resisted this long just because I hate taking pills, I'm becoming more forgetful, insurance issues, and I just really don't want to be blamed when something goes wrong. But I really don't want to freak out about babies again. It's bad enough when I freak out on my own about it, but when Matt freaks me out over it then it's all bad. And besides, it's gotta help me with my period. I can't be downing Midols all the time.
I've been slowly making my way back into Japanese stuff. I feel like for the past couple of months I've heard nothing but Mandarin and English, which is funny considering my family speaks Cantonese. Anyways, I finally started listening to albums on my computer that I never really played and I've been craving Japanese food lately. I've been making onigiris whenever I get a chance and now that I'm crampy all I want to eat is a nice big bowl of udon. I was going to make some tonkatsu for dinner until I found out we ran out of eggs and we don't actually have any Panko crumbs (but I swear we did!). If no one replaces the eggs then I guess I'll just bake my pork chops :/
I swear there's a black hole in our fridge that only sucks up butter. There is never any butter when I need it. The last time I bought some I got 4 sticks and only used one to make the peanut butter chocolate chips cookies. I looked in there recently and my butter was all gone. I bought some more butter today and I swear, if it's all gone by next week I'm buying a mini fridge and storing it my room.
I watched Battle Royale on Halloween and it reminded me that I really wanted to cosplay as the training video girl. Her costume's not that hard and it'll give me a chance to finally have a cosplay with a weapon.
I made my uncle a birthday card. Domokun came out kinda funny looking and I don't know if my uncle really knows who he is, but I thought it'd be funny. Plus Domokun's at Target. It's kinda weird.
Did you know libraries pay hella money just for being a page? Our libraries are hiring new pages for most of the branches and my mom's making me apply. It's $16/hr. That's like working AE AND Sears at the same time on the same day. I hope I get it. That first loan payment made me really sad since I knew I wouldn't get it back.
Must...stop....playing Usher's "Making Love In This Club"
//end 01:39am
HAPPY BIRTHDAY ADELA
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Thursday, October 30th, 2008
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I don't know what to say. I feel very lost in life. And now Matt is freaking me out and I'm really in an "OMFG WTF Life?" mood. Ugh!
( TMI )
I may or may not be heading down to SC tomorrow for Halloween with Kes. One way or another, I'm having a drink.
end //12:01am
HAPPY late/early BIRTHDAY TO MOM, MATT'S DAD, UNCLE BERT, JO, ANTOINE, & BART BOY
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Saturday, October 18th, 2008
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I spent the past few days at Matt's house. This whole insomnia thing is getting crazy. Matt was hoping to build his steady cam with me but I never woke up early enough. Yesterday I finally came home and I didn't go to sleep until noon. NOON! It's frikkin ridiculous.
I had a dream we were at a mall and bowling. Then Matt ran outside to the mall and I ran after him holding a bowling ball. He bumped into my ex and his friend. They were working mall security and he had on these ridiculous thick glasses. I was so distracted by the bowling ball I was carrying that I yelled to Matt to talk to my ex as I went back to put the ball away. When I came back outside my ex left. Matt and I then went into the back of a costume store and tried to talk. I forgot if I told him everything or nothing. Either way, I woke up pretty bummed out that that would even happen even if it was just a dream.
We're approaching 2 years and I feel like I'm killing what we have because of how sad I've been these past few months.
Nothing really make me happy anymore. I don't really know who I am. I feel like I lost everything when I moved back home, as if everything I ever was was in SC.
That episode of Heroes made me so mad. They're killing off all my favorite characters. If Mohinder dies at the end of this season then I'm done with the show.
Wayne Wang's new film The Princess of Nebraskais showing in it's entirety on youtube.
//end 03:56am
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Monday, October 6th, 2008
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I've been baking a lot lately. This week alone I made peanut butter & chocolate chip cookies with Matt, steamed buns with mushroom filling, and today I made a dried pork roll. The cookies came out really floury since the recipe called for a lot of flour and I used half the butter (my mom wants me to cut down on butter in all my cooking). Matt should be editing a video together of it right now. My first batch of steam buns turned out decent but I didn't let my mushrooms soak long enough so my filling was kinda bleh. The recipe also didn't make that much dough so my buns were pretty small and only got a dinky amount of filling. Most of them got a topping of dried pork which helped my mushrooms not be so bleh. Today I used the same bun recipe to make the dough for my dried pork roll. My mom told me to make it and only described what it was suppose to be. Basically I made a cinnamon roll with dried pork, cut it up, and steamed it. They came out pretty good. I only made 16 of them and I doubt they'll last very long (I've already eaten 3).
Yum!
 
I'm almost entirely caught up on Heroes, and by almost I mean I just have to watch the last episode of season 2. I'll probably do that before I watch tomorrow's new episode. I can't really say that I love the show but I can't stop watching it just because I need to know what and how things happens. I seriously cannot stand Niki and her family. Hiro's dad has to be my favorite character because he has the best lines and it's frikkin George Takei. Ando's second, and not just because he hadokened Hiro (hilarious!). Mohinder's third just because I could listen to him talk all day long. Also, Tommy shows up in season 2 as an extra. It's funny because before I actually sat down and watched the series the only episode I ever saw was the first one he was in.
I finally drank one of my Guinesses that I bought last week. I can't really chill my booze in the fridge because my mom is pretty strict about us and alcohol, but I needed to drink my Guiness cold. Matt's pretty disgusted by this but I put hella ice in my coffee mug and poured my Guiness into it. To be honest, it wasn't that bad. It got it really cold and I was able to drink it really fast. Normally I'm pretty slow at drinking but this time I just downed the thing.
I did it the next day too with a Steel Reserve. Yes I drank 2 night in a row. And no I'm not turning into a boozer. I haven't had a drink since visiting SC and I haven't one of my own beers in weeks. Usually I drink at night to help me sleep while I'm watching a movie. The only bad thing is having to go to the bathroom because that means I have to walk down noisy stairs in the dark. Not good during a beer buzz.
My period just started...I'll probably wake up barfing :(
//end 03:17am
BTW, BoA's English debut song is out *cringe*
Also, #10 fail.
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Tuesday, September 30th, 2008
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I realized that I can't download any apps onto my iPod Touch. Apparently I need to update my software to 2.0 (2.1 now 9_9) to download apps, which wouldn't be that big of a deal if the update wasn't $9.95. I'm don't really care that much for apps. I can still view them and try them out at the app store and I'm fine with that.
I spent the past 4 days at Matt's house. We haven't seen each other since we went on that SC/MV road trip 2 weeks ago and his parent were going out of town for the weekend. I seriously wasn't planning on staying there that long. Usually it's one or 2 nights max for me, but 4 whole days was a lot. I spent a chunk of it lying on his couch watching TV, pantless, and talking to the dog. It was a good weekend but I was just too moopy to enjoy most of it.
Matt thinks I really need someone's help with my depression. I'm all for it but I think it's pointless just because of the fact that I can't talk when I'm sad. It's physically hard for me to talk when I want to cry. My mouth gets incredibly tense and won't open. Terrible thoughts race through my head and I don't know what to say.
I dunno.
I developed a cough over the weekend. I don't know if I'm still sick from the road trip or this is a new sickness. It seems like the cold is hitting me with each symptom separately.
I used a pore strip today for the first time in weeks and was shocked. I usually don't get that many black/whiteheads so I don't use my pore strips that often. I just used one and holy cow! The only clean spot was the bridge of my nose. Eww...
I just bought a new nail polish and realized that almost all of my nail polishes are purple. Seriously! Patricia gave me a plain purple and lilac one with purple glitter and now I just bought this purple-frosty one. The rest of my polishes are a white one and a top coat.
I should make cookies again now that I bought some real butter. Mmmm, just thinking about them makes me hungry.
//end 03:16am
HAPPY BIRTHDAY BRANDON aka GREAT SAIYAMAN
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Saturday, September 20th, 2008
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Instructions:
Take a picture of yourself right now.
Don't change your clothes, don't fix your hair - just take a picture.
Post that picture with NO editing.
Post these instructions with the picture.
I'll admit that I put some chapstick on before taking this.
My bangs are being awkward.
//end 02:17am
This new keyboard cover is messing up how I type. Err...
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Wednesday, September 17th, 2008
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I don't know if I want to finish the jook my mom made this morning (pot #2 since coming home sick) or make a cup-o-noodles and actually chew on something.
//end 11:55am
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Friday, September 12th, 2008
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Congrats Matt!
Anyways, my 外婆 (grama) made us some joong. I don't know what they're called in Mandarin but they're those riceball things wrapped in banana leaves and sorta look like a grenade. You know, these things:
Anyways, as I was eating one for lunch and I remembered how much my 奶奶 (the other grama) liked to gives them to us as kids. Back then we had two kinds of joong- a brown kind and a white kind. The brown ones were my favorite back then because they have to be dipped in a bowl of sugar. Now I prefer the white ones. It's not that my tastes "grew up" (I still love sweets) but that my 奶奶 died and I can't get the brown kind anymore.
奶奶 is the only person I know who makes the brown kind. Nowadays the only joongs I get are the white ones from my 外婆, and even then I don't get them that often. 外婆's food is terrible, but her joongs are good. It makes me wonder if she even makes them herself.
Joongs are one of those things that make me remember my 奶奶. She'll randomly come to mind sometimes and when she does I can't help but be sad.
Om nom nom nom
//end 01:34am
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Monday, September 8th, 2008
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I had a dream I was choking my cousin Charles. He's 9 years old.
Today was a terrible day. F*cking period.
Kes: Matt & I may be heading your way this weekend. We're going to Santa Cruz this Friday so we'll be in the area.
*snuggles heating pad*
//end 12:41am
BTW, I realized one of my biggest nightmares: having my period and being stuck in the van next to Charles who wants to throw up while being stuck in traffic on the lower deck of a bridge and then having an earthquake. 98% of that happened today.
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annoyed.
satisfied.
blah.
dorky.
confused.
